her teenage hell

my konstantine

2007-02-13T14:44:46Z

I can't imagine all the people that you know
and the places that you go
when the lights are turned down low
and I don't understand all the things you've seen
but i'm slipping inbetween
you and your big dreams
it's always you
in my big dreams

and you tell me that it's over
wake up lying in a patch of four leaf clovers
and your restless, and i'm naked
you've gotta get out
you can't stand to see me shaking
no
could you let me go?
I didn't think so

and you don't wanna be here in the future
so you say the present's just a pleasent interruption to the past
and you don't wanna look much closer
cuz your afraid to find out all this hope
you had sent into the sky by now had crashed
and it did
because of me

and then you bring me home
afraid to find out that you're alone
and i'm sleeping in your living room
but we don't have much room to live

I had these dreams that i learned to play guitar
maybe cross the country
become a rock star
and there was hope in me that i could take you there
but dammit you're so young
well i don't think i care
and if i hurt you
then i'm sorry
please don't think that this was easy

then you bring me home
cuz we both know what it's like to be alone
and i'm dreaming in your living room
but we don't have much room to live

and konstantine is walking down the stairs
doesn't she look good
standing in her underwear
and i was thinking
what i was thinking
we've been drinking and it doesn't get me anywhere

my Konstantine came walking down the stairs
and all that i could do is touch her long blonde hair
and i've been thinking
it hurts me thinking that these nights
when we were drinking no they never got us anywhere
no

this is because i can spell konfusion with a k
and i like it
it's to dying in another's arms and why I had to try it
it's to jimmy eat world and those nights in my car
when the first star you see may not be a star
I'm not your star
isn't that what you said
what you thought this song meant

and if this is what it takes
just to lie in my mistakes
and live with what i did to you
and all the hell I put you through
I always catch the clock
it's 11:11
and now you want to talk
it's not hard to dream
you'll always be my konstantine

konstantine, they'll never hurt you like i do
no they'll never hurt you like i do
no, no, no no no no no no

this is to a girl who got into my head
with all the pretty things she did
hey
you know
you keep me up in bed
this is to a girl who got into my head
with all the fucked up things i did
hey
maybe
baby
you could keep me up in bed
my Konstantine
spin around me like a dream we played out on this movie screen
and i said
did you know i missed you? [x7]
oh god i miss you

and then you bring me home
and we'll go to sleep, but this time, not alone, no no
and you'll kiss me in your living room
i know
you'll miss me in your living room
cuz these nights i think maybe that i'll miss you in my living room
we don't have much room
i said does anybody need that room?
because we all need a little more room
to live

my Konstantine

wow i havent seen deadjournal in a long time

2007-02-09T02:44:58Z

well since i havent been here in years heres an update:

- out of high school [finally]
- nursing assistant/going 2 school 2 be a nurse
- the love of my life gizmo [my cat] died
- moved from New York to North Carolina

ill be updating more soon [and fixing this journal up a little]

littlepinky13 @ 2004-08-11T02:25:00

2004-08-11T06:26:50Z

leaving this journal go 2

www.deadjournal.com/~sickgirlpinky

comment to be added 2 it ;]

littlepinky13 @ 2004-08-09T11:10:00

2004-08-09T15:11:33Z

new layout.. parents arent home yay now i can run nakie in the house blasting music.. yeah wow im a retard

littlepinky13 @ 2004-08-08T19:24:00

2004-08-08T23:25:49Z

idk how many ppl really read this anymore but i might retire this journal soon.. if anyone has one 2 give away just comment

littlepinky13 @ 2004-08-07T09:16:00

2004-08-07T13:18:52Z

im just fucking speechless.. the past 2 fucking days have been a fucking hell. im just lost in my own thoughts once again. scared 2 move and scared to try 2 say anything anymore. why am i so fucking numb?

littlepinky13 @ 2004-08-05T00:02:00

2004-08-05T04:04:03Z

lala.. city 2morrow yayness ;P .. i love u skanks<33

littlepinky13 @ 2004-08-03T22:34:00

2004-08-04T02:36:15Z

hey a busy shit.. ugh.. tired sleep<33

littlepinky13 @ 2004-08-01T14:32:00

2004-08-01T18:33:37Z

talking 2 jason.. umm bday was so/so if ne one has a great tattoo place on long island tell me ;]

littlepinky13 @ 2004-07-30T12:22:00

2004-07-30T16:24:02Z

my birthdays 2morrow yayness<3.. umm nothing going on here rite now ill talk later ;D

littlepinky13 @ 2004-07-29T20:07:00

2004-07-30T00:08:54Z

back Nj kinda sucked rained.. nothing 2 do.. long ride there and back with a shitload of traffic

littlepinky13 @ 2004-07-28T00:57:00

2004-07-28T05:04:26Z

hi everyone.. ive been out for a while did some thinking.. nothing has come out of it but fear, good fear? bad fear? who knows. phils coming back in a few days i dont know how that is going to work out im just so scared of being hidden to him, when i was with him i was scared to show him anything of myself. i couldnt show him real love. i care about him.. but i just didnt "love him". after i worked on myself for months i finally realized that, maybe ill get 2 know him more then he can see the REAL me instead of the ashley that was hiding from the world. maybe one day he'll understand wat ive been thru more then he knows now. hopefully we could be friends, hopefully he will talk to me. i have no clue wats gonna happen in these next few days nor do i need too. its gonna take its course wats done is done. and wats not finished hopefully ill know.

littlepinky13 @ 2004-07-26T22:34:00

2004-07-27T02:41:26Z

hey everyone weds. going 2 new jersey overnight<3.. umm just hanging out with some people.. dave suprized me n came over<33 nothing much else

littlepinky13 @ 2004-07-22T23:33:00

2004-07-23T03:35:22Z

going out east 2morrow dont call the house til late.. ugh someone kill me busy day 2 fucking tired to type out my whole day so im gonna be a bitch and not write it<33

littlepinky13 @ 2004-07-22T00:18:00

2004-07-22T04:20:51Z

hey new layout pretty rad huh? lol i did it myself [arent u proud] well u should be.. ugh long day went 2 the city.. got home around umm wow i dont remember then crashed for a little while. well nothing else really going on <33

love ashley

littlepinky13 @ 2004-07-17T10:53:00

2004-07-17T14:56:27Z

chilled with jenn last nite with her friend.. it was really awesome. i missed her so much, were a bunch of fucking idots tho. umm 2day i might see my grandpa cuz hes moving in like 3 days ::sadness::. its my moms b day yay shes getting older hah o well not my problem. ttyl guys<3

littlepinky13 @ 2004-07-17T00:39:00

2004-07-17T04:40:04Z

new layout tell me wat u think!!! thanks megzz

littlepinky13 @ 2004-07-14T23:59:00

2004-07-15T04:00:04Z

Old school punk! You just say what you have to say
regardless of what everyone else thinks!
You're one of my most favourite types of
music... You're raw and uncut! You're
surrounded by hype...just don't let it make you
go insane...

What genre of rock are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

wow read this

2004-07-14T02:59:57Z

A girl and a guy were speeding over 100mph on a deserted road on a motorcycle.

Girl: Slow down, we're going too fast. I'm scared! And I don't want anything to happen.

Guy: Come on, don't worry. I know what I'm doing. Your having fun right?

Girl: NO...please stop. I'm really scared

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I LOVE YOU! Now please slow down.

Guy: Give me a hug.

*Girl hugs him*

Guy: Can you help me out here? Will you take me Helmet off of me and put it on you? It's bugging me.

In the paper the next day: A motorcycle has crashed into a building break failure. Two people found, but only one survived.

The Truth is: That halfway down the road the guy realized that his breaks broke, but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead, he had her say she loved him and felt her hug him for one last time. Then had her wear him helmet so she would live, even though it meant that he would die.

i wish..

2004-07-14T00:28:03Z

You are a goddess!

Which Ultimate Beautiful Woman are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

littlepinky13 @ 2004-07-13T02:42:00

2004-07-13T06:45:02Z

omg i fucking can stand my parents they are just so fucking immature.. im sick and tired of all this bullshit in my life. i wanna have total control of wat i do with my life and who i wanna be with. i cant have people choose for me, if i dont choose for myself i will never be happy

littlepinky13 @ 2004-07-11T01:42:00

2004-07-11T05:45:35Z

omg rad ass time 2day went 2 my grandmas chilled there drank a lil. went 2 a block party from like 1 in the afternoon til just now.. it was fucking amazing partys are the shit saw some people from my old high school met some new ppl.. chilled with jess and christine it was a great time<33 ilu jess n christine <3 *beer pong for all!!* and ps toni it was great seeing you i miss talking 2 you!!<33

littlepinky13 @ 2004-07-08T22:03:00

2004-07-09T05:04:12Z

in love with him once again.. hopefully he'll treat me right this time. dont want another heartbreak again

littlepinky13 @ 2004-07-05T20:42:00

2004-07-06T03:44:39Z

eh long night, sleep is fucking awesome.. but i cant go 2 sleep ive been going 2 bed at 4 everynight for some reason. somethings upsetting me i cant figure out what it is... eh o well ill update a lil more later on or 2morrow

jason this is for you

2004-07-04T05:00:41Z

Your Smiling Face
(James Taylor)

Whenever I see your smiling face
I have to smile myself
Because I love you (Yes, I do)
And when you give me that pretty little pout
It turns me inside out
There's something about you, baby (I don't know)

(Chorus)
Isn't it amazing a man like me
Can feel this way
Tell me how much longer
I will grow stronger every day
Oh, how much longer

I thought I was in love
A couple of times before
With the girl next door
But that was long before I met you
Now I'm sure that I won't forget you
And I thank my lucky stars
That you are who you are
And not just another lovely lady
Sent down to break my heart

Isn't it amazing a man like me
Can feel this way
Tell me how much longer
I can grow stronger every day
How much longer

No one can tell me that I'm doing it wrong today
Whenever I see you smile at me
No one can tell me that I'm doing it wrong today
Whenever I see your smile at face my way
No one can tell me that I'm doing it wrong today
No one can tell me that I'm doing it wrong today

---------------------------------------------------

thank you jason for being there when i needed you the most. you never gave up hope for me and ill never give up on you. jason you are a amazing guy and i thank you for everything. with everything we went through together, u make a great friend<3